by Leland Carina

Those of us who live a BDSM lifestyle often run into very awkward moments with professionals. Imagine trying to explain to a realtor why exactly you need a large, sound-proof workroom with weight-bearing exposed beams in your new house. Or try telling the priest who will be officiating your wedding that the groom will be crawling up the aisle to be married in a gimp suit.

Being kinky can also cause you to get worse service, even if the professional you are working with is open-minded. I had this experience when I was seeing a therapist some years ago. Even though she was non-judgemental, I spent most of our sessions teaching her about BDSM. She was very interested, but that is not what I was paying for.

Seeing an unaware professional can also be very disruptive. When a patient needs medical attention for a specific issue, doctors can be extremely distracted by evidence of play left on their body. It is not appropriate to be forced to defend consensuality during a medical exam.

In the worst cases, seeing a non-aware professional can even be dangerous. My therapy experience was fairly mild, but with a more closed-minded professional the result can be disastrous. This could lead patients to shame their own healthy sexual proclivities, rather than getting to the root of the actual issues.

Luckily, there is a resource to help with this issue. Guy Baldwin and Race Bannon started the Kink Aware Professionals (KAP) List between 1982 and 1986. Baldwin started with a focus on psychotherapy, but it later grew to include quite a large number of professions including Spiritual Advisors, Web Specialists, Realtors, and more. The KAP List is now updated and maintained by the National Coalition of Sexual Freedom.

How great would it be to be able to have an in-depth and honest conversation with your Doctor about safe ways to insert increasingly larger objects into your various orifices? Or to ask your Life Coach to help build a cohesive business plan for your new pro-domme business? With access to Kink Aware Professionals, we can access the services we need to enrich our lives.

Check it out for yourself. Spread the word to people who might need it. If you know Kink Aware Professionals in your area, encourage them to get added to the registry! Not only does this allow us to support other kinky people with our business, but it is also vital to help protect our community.

*** Leland Carina is a Graphic Designer at Kink.com. She's also very active in the local sex-positive community; she is a Senior Correspondent for Leatherati.com, Editor in Chief of Leatherpage.com, Founder of the current San Francisco girls of Leather, and an Organizational Representative on the Board of the San Francisco Bay Area Leather Alliance.